Turn of Events

I previously reported that our Puppy, Brody was supposed to go to prison for training... Well I couldn't go through with that. Those of you who have met and spent any more than 30 seconds with our beast are probably asking yourself "Well, why the hell not?” Well, I'll be the first to tell you that he is out of control. He is ridiculously hyper, and has a serious "jumping" issue. But even after all of that and knowing what a blessing it would have turned out to be to send him to Prison, it wasn't worth being alone. You see Kevin and Brody are my family now. With Kevin being deployed I just couldn't bear to send Brody away too. As much as he works my nerves and really does need the training he's all the company I have at home. He's there every morning and he needs me to get out of bed and feed him, and play with him, give him my attention and love, let him out so that he can go potty... he needs me. And I need to be needed. It is the best distraction I've found for being without my hubby. So, Wednesday (the day before Brody was due to go to prison) it hit me like a ton of bricks. Every time I would look at Brody I would want to cry or puke. Not to mention the fact that I haven't really slept in over 4 days, and couldn't fall asleep until after 1AM. So about midnight I made the command decision that I wasn't going to take Brody to the Prison. I figured if I was having that hard of a time with it I needed to listen to what my body was trying to tell me and not go through with it. But I struggled with that for a while, because I had promised Kevin that we would get Brody taken care of while he was gone. I knew it was something that he was really wanting accomplished while he was gone, so I felt bad that I was making a decision without speaking with him. So, true to form I fall asleep about 120 (or so) and Kevin calls me about 230 AM... he tends to have bad timing when it comes to things like that. Well I love him all the same. He was great and completely backed me up. We did agree to look into options that are not so far away from home, and I agreed to start walking our beast everyday- he has to get the whole "leash" thing sooner or later right? Well, that's what I'm hoping!

Well, the lack of sleep the last week or so is really troubling... not sure why it's happening now or where it's coming from. What I do know, is I'm sick and tired of it! :) Speaking of tired, that isn't the problem- I'm plenty sleepy... the actual sleeping part is proving to be quite difficult. Not sure I understand that combo, but in the mean time Tylenol PM is my B.F.F. and we're getting along quite well!