I am getting off topic....
My point is, there is a lot looming on the horizon for our humble little family. We will be welcoming our lil' babe the end of August/Beginning of September. However, we have another PCS looming. My husband is a member of one of the two units being 86'd from the EUCOM theater, as announced about ten days ago by Secretary of Defense, Leon Panetta, see here. We are moving and I would say with about 80% certainty it will be back to the US. We were visited by USAREU Commanding General earlier this month to discuss the coming changes to our small Post as well as the future of our unit. I am nervous about the projected timeframe. I am nervous about the lack of information. I am trying not to stress. Stress is bad juju for a preggers like myself. My amazing husband keeps telling me to let him deal with it- let him stress it. To his credit, he is doing everything he can to seek out new sources of information and relay that back to me.
Here's my problem. You would think by now with my lifetime of knowledge and experience I would be used to not being a priority. I know this for a fact, and accept it to be true. But, I suppose I still have no made peace with it. I'm pregnant. I will be unable to travel after 34 weeks, the end of July. This is my cause for stress. The nurse at my intake appointment in Landstuhl actually told me my husband may have to report to his next duty station and I'd have to remain in Germany to deliver our baby and meet up with him later. To sum up my response, it was something to the effect of "over my dead body!" it is possible I used at least one expletive.
Ideally, in my picture-perfect world, we would have orders in-hand (we all know that's crucial to getting anything accomplished in the military forum) already and have the ball rolling. This is sadly, not the case and no one knows anything- as per SOP in these situations. Basically, if I had it my way I would deliver this lil' bundle of joy in the states. However, pregnancy is not a disability and a newborn is not reason enough to get things the way I want them. You see, while pregnancy will restrict my travel time line, it does not mean I cannot travel with my babe in tow (you know, outside of my person). As much as I do not want (cue foot stomping and pouting) to worry about 10+ hours inside a trans-Atlantic flight with my baby, does not mean I will not have to and does not mean that it cannot be done. I will not be the first or the last to face this. I know I can handle it, I'm just really apprehensive about it.
Logically I just don't understand why I have to face my apprehensions head-on. Seeing as though some of the higher-ranking enlisted personnel have already seen their DEROS change received their new orders. Why them and not us? This is when I lose my patience, and fight the urge to get angry. Based on my knowledge that no one will advocate for us or our situation I have to accept this situation as it comes or make things happen for ourselves (or allow my husband to do so).
I know I have successfully proven to my 289 online-friends that I'm just a big ol' brat. But... aren't we all sometimes? While my apprehensions are not insurmountable they are legitimate and I'm sure other mommies out there can back me up!
5 comments:
No chance in hell I would tackle all that on my own without my husband being deployed. You have every right to be stressed, and apprehensive. Welcome to being a Mommy! Every thought changes from what it once was. There are also certain things that a women should never have to do alone. Birth, and traveling across the globe are two of them. Keep fighting for answers, and hopefully you get them prior to July.
Worse case have you thought about just heading back to Colorado in case answers aren't soon enough? How big is the chance that you will stay in Germany?
You're not being a brat at all I think we would all stamp our hormonal feet and throw a tantrum if we were in your situation. I hope you find out some news soon huni.
p.s. I flew with Madison by myself to England when she was 9 weeks old and she slept the WHOLE way, the younger they are the better the flight!
You are no way being a brat! The uncertainty alone would be enough to throw me off my rocker and adding being pregant, I'd surely lose it! This drawdown is a scary thing and even though my husband and his unit are state side we are going threw something similar but ours are only rumors of his BDE being cut.
OH goodness do I know how you feel. No kids in tow for us.. so I can be thankful for that. But we are also waiting on orders. Hubs gets back this summer and we will have to PCS, but as of now.. we still don't know where that is. Stressful much? I hope you get your answers soon and are able to keep stressfree!
I would have your husband contact his Branch Manager! THEY can get the ball rolling, or perhaps rolling faster. Sadly, in today's military world you really DO have to be your own advocate!!!!! Also the 'squeeky wheel' theory works! All while maintaining military bearing of course, *wink*.
Hang in there! Been there, done that. All I can say, as a veteran, an Army wife, an Air Force Mom and an Army Mom, stuff has a way of working itself out. Word. Keep the faith, keep your composure, keep rolling! HOOAH!
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